All things adulting, Career

What to consider before becoming besties with your boss?

Considering the amount of time, we spend at the office it would be to our advantage to get along with our colleagues as this creates a better foundation for teamwork. Getting to know your boss a bit better might prevent you going all horrible bosses on them (no killing them is not an option).Rather seeing them as human beings with lots of responsibility.

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I have had my fair share of boss’s ones that have become role models and ones that have triggered my anxiety, I don’t really do the middle ground thing well nhe? Whilst I won’t tell you whether you should or should not become besties with your boss. I can help with a few things to consider before coming to such a decision.

Understand and Respect the power dynamic

I once had a colleague who was also my supervisor, we became close and used to share personal stories. Nevertheless, when it came time to critique of my work I never used her personal problems as fodder for leverage. My inherent understanding that she was my supervisor first and friend second led to us becoming the best of friends even way after we changed jobs. If you can accept and respect that power dynamic, this can be the basis of a good working relationship/ friendship.

Do not become social media friends

As a rule of thumb for me I do not friend my bosses on social media and if we use WhatsApp to communicate I block them from seeing my stories. You see dear reader the internet never forgets and those lovely drunken memories popping up might be hilarious but I doubt your boss will share your sentiment. Likewise, it can take one rant about your work (which you shouldn’t post online anyway, but who’s perfect? and you can find yourself in disciplinary procedures.

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Do not tell them about Suzanne the office ….

Under no circumstances are you to share office gossip with them. Your intentions might be good perhaps you want to laugh with a friend and have an inside joke. However your boss has the power to fire these people. In the same token you  cannot use the private time you share to complain about work or about people you do not like in the office.

Positive work life

The one upside is that the closer you become to your boss the more comfortable you might be able to voice your concerns. Great communication can lead to higher productivity. The office environment might be better for it especially if you do not exclude the other employees.


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After having read all the things to consider, I think one more aspect you have to think through is what sort of friendship you are wanting. Is it the odd drink after work and talking general talk or is it the shared holidays and meeting families? The latter can create quite blurred lines however if you are both mature people then you navigate your way, create your own type of friendship with clear boundaries. As always thanks for your non-refundable gift that is your time, let me know your thoughts on the comments section.


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