That music is too loud and all all other things our Moms were right about
May 8, 2022
I am a bonus mom to awesome girls. One day we were baking and they were helping me and I happened to taste the mixture and something was missing. When I enquired I was told that they halved one ingredient because they figured I made a mistake. I responded by saying I am older and have been baking for years and when it comes to certain things they will have to trust me. It will make sense when they are older. In that moment not only did I realize I am becoming my mom but she was right! Skip a couple of months later and I am asking friends to share some advice or lessons their moms shared that their younger selves couldn’t understand but older selves totally agrees with.
As a child I used to hate left overs and now that I am slowly getting into adulting, I’m seeing that food is really expensive. As a result I’m seeing my mom was right we really do have food at home there’s no need to buy take-away. She also used to say I need to be my own best friend and as a teenager that didn’t make sense as my friends were my best friends. I am now realizing she meant before I can be in any relationship of any kind I need to love me first. My friends will come and go, I’m the only constant. That has resulted in me learning to rest, embrace my flaws and spoil myself.
My mom used to say she’s doing it from a place of love and not controlling me, whenever she was holding me back or disciplining me. I have since realized it was always from a place of love and protection and how lucky I am.
” Keep things to yourself so people can’t hold everything against you. A woman must always have a good pair of black shoes ” and she was right I now have several pairs of black shoes. She also used to say “to avoid procrastination, do the hard things first”- I still do this to this day.
My mom always used to be too tired to do things like swim with me. Or get annoyed when I didn’t do something like take the chicken out of the deep freeze. Now that I am an adult, I feel that in my soul! I don’t have any kids but man, I’m so tired ALL the time.
My mom used to say there’s ” rice and dhaal at home”, now whenever I want to buy something unnecessary I say that to myself. I appreciate the foundation my mom gave me and my faith all of which without, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. When my dad died she took over the role of being a mom and dad. It has been hard without him but mom walked the journey with us.
My mom used to say “Saturdays are for umngqusho”. Now that I am older and a mom I cook it on Saturdays. And the nice thing is that even if unexpected visitors pitch there’s enough for everyone.
My mom used to tell me not to walk barefoot on tiles whilst on monthlies because my cramps would get worse. It took me a whilst but I definitely agree she was onto something. She also used to tell me to cook more because she wouldn’t be here forever. Now that she has passed I cook because I don’t have a choice, but I enjoy feeling like she’s watching over me whilst I’m busy at the stove.
She used to tell me to choose myself each and everyday and that I would never regret that, she was absolutely correct.
Whenever times were bad my mom used to tell me, life doesn’t go in reverse. This was her way of telling me that things get better and life does move on. Not only was she correct but I say this to myself when in a tricky situation.
My mom has always been a gentle soul. She’s that person in our neighbourhood willing to give her last sugar and feed local kids. As a young adult I used to do my grocery shopping in her cupboard. She taught me to treat people how I want to be treated and not how they treat me.
” Life doesn’t come with a manual, it comes with a mother.-unknown”
The older I have gotten my mom has become my best friend, my younger self would be so shocked. She would absolutely die at the realization that I now agree with my mom more. I hope today’s post made you chuckle and appreciate your mom even more. Thank you so much to all my friends and family who contributed and made this article possible. This post is dedicated to all moms but especially Aunty Nancy (Kim’s mom), who died due to COVID last year. She was this blogs biggest fan and one of our last conversations was her saying my last post was too short and I promised her a longer one. Also thanks to Mambhele and my granny for all their prayers and advice that have made me the woman I am today. May we love and honour the people who play a motherly role in our lives. If you have any story to share about your mom please do so in the comments below.